Intervention

Yes, the show, Intervention on A & E.  I could watch a marathon of it and not change the channel.  I’m horrified, it scares me, saddens me and makes me HOPE that there is really hope out there for people who are broken by addiction to drugs, gambling, whatever possesses them to lose their family, friends and whole life.

I saw a quote on the commercial for the show by Ernest Hemingway:

 

“The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry.”
Ernest HemingwayA Farewell to Arms, 1929
US author & journalist (1899 – 1961)
Wow.
I was on facebook looking at messages yesterday and one status update scared me.  I won’t say who it was, I don’t even know this person very well.  But this person was talking about ending it all.  On Christmas Day.
This person’s close friends and acquaintances was saying they cared, hoping this person didn’t do what he was threatening to do and I was afraid.  This person is hurt, clearly.  This person feels alone, obviously.  This person feels like no one understand his pain, but there are those that do.
I had a friend a long time ago who thought of suicide and threatened it.  I’m glad that night the threat was made, her family went into action looking for her.  My friend had thought about jumping off the bridge into the freeway, I didn’t know this-she didn’t reach out to me that day even though her family thought maybe I had talked to her.  I think today she’s happy and okay.  I lost touch with her years ago but I hear from friends she’s doing well and I’m so very happy for her.  I’m grateful she is alive and survived life so far.
Earlier this year, I lost a family member to suicide.  She hung herself.  Unexpectedly.  She leaves behind a family that grieves her and a son that needs his mother.  I remember seeing her in the hospital when they thought they could save her.  I’ve seen family members with stroke, cancer, even someone who was in a motorcycle accident and died, but never had I known someone to commit suicide.  For some reason, this was something I couldn’t understand or grasp even though the other things: illness, or accident, I could…kind of grasp a lot better.
A few months ago on a Hawaii News Broadcast they said 1 in every 3 days someone in Hawaii dies of suicide.  Also there is a New York Times article that says Hawaii is ranked 2nd in life satisfaction BUT we have the 5th highest suicide rate in the country?!
That makes me sad.  I didn’t grow up behind a white picket fence.  I didn’t grow up in a wealthy family.  My family worked hard, we packed into a house with five different families so we could live in Hawaii, that’s how hard it is to make it here if you are lower to middle class.  Conditions were more difficult to live in, I suppose the pressures on me to succeed and not disappoint was always there.  I didn’t see my dad on some weekends because he was building houses 7 days a week sometimes.  Just so we could have the life he didn’t.  I wanted to make my life worth it for his hard work.  I guess my friend who attempted/thought of suicide had the same pressures as I did.  We both talked about it.  We both wrote letters about how we couldn’t handle the pressures and wished our parents would be proud of what we had accomplished so far.
I came out okay without attempting suicide.  Thank you God.  I had enough love around me, people to listen to me-even if sometimes that wasn’t family but FRIENDS…people to understand me.  That helps.  Just to have someone listen, a best friend you trust with all your heart.  I had a journal.  I had my own faith in God (I didn’t attend church regularly-but I didn’t need church to make me believe in God).  I had prayer.  I had a lot of resources around me.
The world didn’t even try killing me in high school.  High school was so easy compared to AFTER high school.  Then the world tried hard to kill me 4 years ago when my first husband died.  But I’m still alive, aren’t I?  I grew strong in my most broken place.  My heart.  Today my heart is strong and loves even harder.
Because I have family that won’t let me be alone and I have friends that won’t let me die…they always wish the best for me and I will always do the same for them.
But no doubt about it, no one is immune to life’s miseries.  Something will devastate you.  It happens to everyone.  You are never alone even if you think you are. People do care and people will listen.  I hope people learn to listen better and believe when someone tells them they don’t want to be alive anymore.  We should all observe and listen.  Someone you know could be really hurting…

photo credit: sarah sideways

“The world BREAKS EVERYONE and afterward, many are STRONG in the broken places…”
If you feel that the world has broken you…..Be strong in the BROKEN places.
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